If you click on the picture above, it will take you to a store where you can buy a “Mordor Fun Run” t-shirt. It is absolutely true that “One does not simply walk into Mordor.” But, why walk when you can run?
Imagine running through the startling landscape of Mordor. It mixes the challenges of cross-country with steeplechase while giving you a fine frisson of fear that will last you the entire race. That heady mix of adrenaline with a chaser of sheer terror is unequaled in any other race in which you can run.
Where else can you meet dead soldiers who try to entice you into drowning yourself in a hypnotic stupor? Where else can live soldiers decide that you might just make a fine corpse? Where else can you find safety nets that will catch you if you are running too fast, along with giant spiders who will suck out all your life juices as a punishment for breaking the speed limit?
A guide who knows the area is provided, unfortunately, he may try to betray you and then eat you, but, he does know the area! We can guarantee you that there is no hotter ending to the race than the ending found in the Mordor Fun Run. Remember, “one does not simply walk into Mordor,” one runs!
In addition, surviving the Mordor Fun Run automatically makes you a winner. You will wake up in fields of rejoicing where the crowds will cheer your survival. Unfortunately, we cannot guarantee that you will have all your body parts, but you will be highly praised by the local governing authorities. [Note: the management of the Mordor Fun Run is not responsible for any post-event counseling that you may find necessary.]
For additional information on Mordor Fun Runs, look up either Doxacon Seattle or Geekonomicon, both are comic cons that you may find both inspiring and interest. For information on Doxacon Seattle, go to http://www.doxacon.org/. This will be an overtly Orthodox Christian con later this month. For information on Geekonomicon click here. It will take place this coming December. I am involved in it and making plans for the “Blessing of the Geeks.”