Okay, I must confess something. I often feel completely inept when hearing the confessions of children. Once they reach the age of early adolescence, I know how to talk with them and how to counsel them. From then on I am comfortable in fulfilling my priestly duties. But, when I hear the confessions of children in elementary school, I am often at a loss.
Perhaps it is because the confessions are so standard at that age. You know, “I disobeyed my parents,” or, “I was mean to my [brother or sister],” etc. I know that there are priests who have had the sad experience of having a child of that age reveal some terrible event. But, I have had the experience that I think is probably more typical of most priests, which is that of children coming to confess the “standard” sins typical of a child that age.
I think part of my problem is that I want to pat them on the head and tell them that it is OK. Except that it really is not OK. A sin is a sin, and I do not want the children to begin building up a mind habit of thinking that some sins are OK, or even cute. Though it probably sounds petty to some, it is not. Most sins are learned habits that begin with a small violation that is the crack that eventually leads to a big violation. And, becoming careless about certain small sins begins to ever-so-slightly sear the soul which allows one to become careless about bigger sins, in a progression that can slowly lead to mortal sin.
And yet, they are so cute at that age. Yes, I am a doting grandfather to our grandchildren. And, I admit that this carries over to my view of all children of that age range. So, it is difficult for me to find a balance in the way that I speak to those children so that I will neither excuse their sin nor unduly burden them with future possibilities. So, as I said at the begining, I often feel completely inept when hearing the confessions of children. And now you have heard MY confession to you.
Thank God they are going to confession! Would to God Lutherans would learn from these children.
Art Casci
How early are they starting to go to Confession?
8th grade at the time of confirmation is when I have the kids come to confession for the first time.
What is the age for the Orthodox?
Because we have no formal First Communion, nor do we have Confirmation as a sacrament years after Baptism, it means there are no clear guidelines as to confession. Technically, since any baptized infant can receive the Body and Blood of Christ (and does), this would seem to mean that any child that has a recognition of having done something sinful should be able to confess, even if not in a fully formal setting.
In several churches in which I have visited, often it means in practice that with first-grade Sunday School, teachers will point the children toward confession.
But, let’s be cautious about making the argument for that Sacrament based only on how cognitively aware of sin a person is. Confession, if we think it through fully, gets us into the realm of people, such as Down’s Syndrome, severe autism, etc., who may never be fully cognitively aware. People with those types of disabilities present their own challenge to the priest in Confession.
Tell me more about confession in the Orthodox church.
ARt