Responding to a post by another Christian, I posted the reply below. See what you think of it. The original post had to do with a couple who went into missions based on a “faith call” and ended up nearly destroyed.
My wife and I were missionaries. We saw crashes; we saw successes; we ourselves went through pain and agony, but also saw great successes and victories. Even now, a decade since we returned to the USA, I can make no fully logical sense of everything that we experienced. But, there are new churches; there is a new orphanage; there is a new school. The price we paid still weighs on us. We own no house; we have no savings; we are still in serious debt from our missionary experience.
Yet, every time I look back to our missions experience I end up with tears in my eyes. God was at work. People were changed. He was glorified, even in our pain. I know some missionaries who “crashed and burned.” And yet, God was still glorified. Can I explain it all? No, but my experience has convinced me that, like it or not, God knows more than I do as to what is needed for his kingdom to advance, even if sometimes it means that it advances over my pain and agony. Is this unfair of God? No it is not! We are part of an army, and guess what? In war, in armies, people suffer, not every battle is won. But, it is the war we look at, not the battle, even when we are the ones who pay the price of the battle.
And, sadly, part of the price of a war is that some are indeed damaged by the experience of war. The problem with so much of the “name it and claim it” movement is that they are living in the world in which the war has already been won. But that is not the world we live in. This is the world in which the war is still being fought. There are casualties. There is pain. And, yes, there are those who end up with the Christian version of post traumatic stress syndrome. This is terrible, But, it is the reality of living in a world in which a war is being fought, a war which we will win, but a war which sometimes has terrible consequences.
Thanks for sharing this. My wife and I have been involved in missions pretty much since we were married, as mobilizers in the States, and can empathize. It’s been particularly hard on my wife, mainly on account of fundraising not going remotely as we hoped, but my faith has been put through the wringer at times as well.
And God has proved himself faithful, and continues to do so — perhaps more now than at any other time. We had to sell our house, move in with the parents last year so we could keep serving as we were convinced God wanted us too . . . It doesn’t make sense to all of the people around us, and sometimes it doesn’t make sense to us either.
“The riddles of God are more satisfying than the solutions of man.” – G.K. Chesterton
Thank you for posting this, Fr. Ernesto. Thank you.
I am reminded of the sacrifices (and grateful for the sacrifices) made for those who are active in any army–whether the army of the country which protect the security of the country or the Army of God which works on the spiritual. Those who are called to such service are beyond special.
That most distressing thing, however, is that so many of the wounds are caused by “friendly fire”.